I should know better

I've been reading her blog. I know it was going to be a mistake, considering it were her written words that made me fall in love with her with so much finality a few years ago. And it was all pretty much an accident on both occasions, I mean getting to read her "written word" thing(or maybe it includes the falling in love as well).

I knew it was going to be a mistake. Coz then I wouldn't have to think of her. Coz time and distance would have kept her a memory than give me the reality of a person. And I've always been better in handling memories than people. It isn't good when you find out she's single again, or know that she's hurting from something, or that you and her aren't really that different at all. You value the same things, search for the same things, hope for the same things, hurt from the same things, and maybe even see the world in the same way. Worst of all, you keep thinking if this is all just in your head, or if you should do something with the gnawings of your heart. You think of the absurdity of it all; if these feelings somehow have some reason or purpose to it, if these thoughts are even valid, if there was something you should have done then or if there is anything you can or should do now.

It is both the best and worst thing to know, that there is someone like her out there. But regardless of whichever of the two is more truthful, I will always be thankful... that there is someone like her out there.

....

"There is no remedy for love but to love more." - Henry David Thoreau