I had a dream once...

I seemed to be on my way to my room when suddenly, she appeared behind me. She wore a striking red dress, that hugged her upper body revealing her neck and shoulders but the skirt spread out slightly(kinda like the kind girls wear to sunday church) and ended just slightly below the knee. I don't recall her saying anything, but she just stands there with an expectant smile. I didn't say anything either, but I scramble for my keys, apparently in a hurry to get my door unlocked, I somehow have the feeling I have to go somewhere with this woman. When I get inside, I rush to find my jacket, to check my wallet, and a to do whole lot of other stuff I think i need before I go. Then I rememeber telling her, "Wait".

"I'm waiting", I hear her say. But when I look back she's no longer at the door. I rush out to see where she's gone, and I see her standing at a distance, her red even more striking against the dark gray stone walls that suddenly surround her. But still she seems calm and still she has that quiet smile.

I rush back inside, I continue to look for something, though I can no longer recall what exactly it was I had to find before I could be with the woman in red. Everytime I check outside the door, she seems to be standing farther away. I keep saying "Wait" as I try to rush my search even faster. And I keep hearing her say, "I'm waiting". One more look outside and I no longer see her, but still I go inside looking for something. And that's when I wake up. But then I hear it one last time...

"I'm waiting..."

....

"Love makes the time pass. Time makes love pass."
-Euripides

CELLPHONE PHOTOGRAPHY

Well, I have been busy lately with the lantern parade preparations being an FA student and all, but working overnight in the college does have it's perks. Like for example, getting to bond with my classmates and walk around the campus at the wee hours. One night was particularly great coz there was a fog...I've never experienced a fog in UP despite my being an "ancient" one. So we took the chance to walk around, and I actually got to take a few cool pictures of it too...though I won't be able to upload most of them coz my computer crashed and these few are the ones I got to salvage. Actually, I only got to salvage one night shot...the rest were taken at around 6am...oh well. It was so cool...literally and figuratively. It was as if we were in baguio coz we could see our breaths whenever we exhale.



It's great I got to save this one coz it's my fave...it looks so eerie...:)












Fog, fog, fog. UP is so beautiful with the fog:)



I got to meet Julia Clarete... though I'm not really sure who she is. I heard she's a famous artista and she won some reality show that let's her have a role in some hollywood flick. I couldn't be in this pic since I am the photographer...bummer.

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"Tragedy is if I cut my finger, comedy is if I walk into an open sewer and die."-Mel Brooks

I remember a little incident I had on my way to work in Makati a few months ago. It was never a big deal for me to commute from UP to the office(or studio rather), and I was surprised at myself for not even feeling a pang of irritation or discomfort when one day, the sight of traffic was really bad because there was a major rally going on. As I finally got to Makati avenue, I was greeted by the largest and longest assembly of people in red shirts with flags that screamed "OUST GLORIA" I have ever seen. Even then, there was hardly any negative reactions from myself to the situation. But I thought it was wise to linger in the streets in the least amount of time possible just in case things would get terribly awry, as this usually seems to happen in the evening news. So I walked at a faster pace on the crowded sidewalk but I was careful not to bump into anyone. But one sidewalk vendor carrying cigarettes and candy in a box on her shoulder made a careless turn as her back was turned to me and we bumped into each other...quite hard, which sent all her stuff flying to the ground with coins making that sound they make only on accidents such as these. She then goes screaming "P!#@$$# Ina!" and a whole lot of other stuff I'm less familiar with. I think she was shouting coz she expected that I would already be a good distance away from the incident but she ceased her profanities when she saw me pick up some of the stuff that fell and that a few others did the same. When everything was back in order she apologized to me and offered some explanation as to why she reacted the way she did at first, though I couldn't really hear her, I think I knew what she was trying to say. To let her know it was okay, I offered her a polite smile and went on my way. It was then I realized that I seemed unusually calm about things. Something was different...good different. Though it isn't exactly unfamiliar territory, it's a rare occurence (as I would suspect would be the case for most of us). I remember one other time I was like this, at some higher state of peace, and it was 7 years ago. I wasn't kidding about it being a rare occurence, hehe. I was still a freshman in college in a new place, on my own and seemingly far from home...though some would probably say I handled the adjustment pretty well. Anyway, I realize now that it was a weird time for me as I look back at it. It was then I think that I found out what God was really about. Probably the best thing that could happen to anyone... wait, let me rephrase that. It is the best thing that could happen to anyone... finding out how REAL He is. That would have probably been the reason why I was at peace with myself back then, a state that lasted for almost two months. But little did I know, that beginning from that time on until the years that would follow, the events that would unfold would destroy a boy. Funny how it turned out. I found my God but lost my way. But I am still thankful, that though my eyes would never hold that same smile I did back then, I still have some semblance of that peace inside me that I found long ago.

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"We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. We grow partially. We are relative. We are mature in one realm, childish in another. The past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present. We are made up of layers, cells, constellations."- Anais Nin