It is not a sin to do what you know is the right thing to do.

But who knows what the right thing is nowadays? Not me. There are just no lines anymore that draw who's right from wrong. There is nothing pure, not evil, not good. So how do you fight something like that? Everything blurs into a mess that leads to apathy. Why should I care? All the good you do leads you to pain(though not without the misleading sporadic moments of peace). All the evil you can do leads to regret (which can be at times arguable). Everybody's got some idea on what the world needs, on what other people deserve and what should happen in their lives. Everybody thinks they know something. Everybody thinks you should do something. They tell you to speak up, as if anybody's ever really listening.

How do you pick a side in a world where everybody's guilty of something? Why do I even have to pick a side? It's such a mess, and it didn't use to be. That's the sad part about it. You see a thing die before your eyes, one by one. Dreams. Innocence. Conscience. Purpose. Relationships. And someday, maybe even hope. One by one, they will die.

Why is there a need to put hate in my heart? Aren't things hard enough as they already are? Why do things break so easily? Why do they evewn ever have to be put in our hands? I have no problems with giving a damn about something. Just don't tell me what to care about, coz i can't. There's only one thing worse about not caring, and it's pretending to care. You think people choose to be numb? You think people don't want to feel anything? How can you be so stupid. Oh sorry, I forgot...you're human.

Maybe I just don't really care. Maybe you don't want me to. Maybe this is all just in our heads. And it sure would've helped though if it didn't hurt so much every now and then. Maybe it's all just semantics and boredom.

I freeze in-between realities. Nothing real, nothing fake. Never known, never really knowing. I'm tired. But I don't have a choice. Or maybe I do. It's just so hard to do. And in the back of your head you know it's because it may never be worth it.

How can a speck of the universe have so much guilt and sadness within it, yet still contain within it's dreams all the stars and galaxies?

I don't know. And something tells me, maybe I never will.


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"It is a sin to believe evil of others, but it is seldom a mistake."- H.L. Menken