My name is James...
Last Sunday, 1:30pm

I("james") was walking from the UP shopping center to my boarding house after I had lunch. When I got to the front of the Infirmary, someone called out to me (a demon hellspawn that crawled out of the woodwork no doubt whom I shall now dub as the "pink diablo")...

pink diablo: Excuse me...
(I turn to look, and notice that the demon has a familiar face...one I see around campus...but faces like his, you could never really get used to seeing.)

pink diablo: uhm, dormer ka ba?

"james": hindi. (I turn away and keep walking as i answer flatly...silently hoping he just wants to ask directions to the nearest plastic surgeon)

pink diablo: boarding house? palagi kitang nakikita dito eh. ako nga pala si (I didn't listen).

...moments of silence...walk walk walk...

pink diablo: Ano pangalan mo?

"james": uhm...(think fast!)...James. (maybe I should've said dante?)

pink diablo: ano college mo? studyante ka ba?

"james": oo

pink diablo: may gagawin ka ba mamaya?

"james" motions hands dismissively.

pink diablo: (doesn't get the point obviously) Gusto mo manood ng sine. *long pause( I don't offer a reply). Libre kita...(he continues).

We are now along the Church of the Risen Lord

pink diablo: sa Area 1 ka ba?

I don't offer a reply but signal my hands as if saying somewhere further off.

pink diablo: natatakot ka ba...?

"james": No. (icy response...is he kidding? scared of his 5 feet of ugliness? He's lucky I don't snuff him out to the fiery pits from whence he came!!)

pink diablo: gusto ko lang naman makipagkaibigan...

"james": ( i turn slightly towards him but never look at him and tell him solidly) Sorry, I'm not interested.

I continue to walk, not turning back to see if he disappeared into a puff of smoke. But for safe measure, I wait out at the ilang shed and pretend to wait for a jeep. after a considerable amount of time, I sense his foul presence has departed and I am free to go home.

....
"In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks."- from the mouths of Calvin and Hobbes