It ends tonight...

I've always wanted to say something like that, hehe. Well, I'm just talking about my stay as an officer in the club known as UNESCO UPD. After 4 consecutive semesters of being the Internals head (acting head on the 1st sem), I think it's time to throw in the towel. It's probably time to look for other things to cause this ol' canucklehead(feeling!:P) some undue stress...preferably the kind of stress that pays, haha. I guess the org can use some new bloods too, I feel spent up. To be quite honest, I've felt like exploding at times, to go off in one of my moods...something some friends of mine would call "the vibe". Something I must be congratulated for, hehe, I've never really held off my vibe for this long...but it does take a lot of conscious effort. But the vibe in actuality is still one of the kinder manifestations of my angst, so people are lucky if thats all they get. But dang it's hard to keep cool these days... and even the little things seem to get on my nerves now. Little things like people asking me why I didn't run, if I still can't take a spot in the execom...and lines like "don't you owe it to the org to..." and stuff like that. I owe the org squat! And frankly, I don't think anyone has the right to ask me to give anything more to this club...save maybe for one other individual. But most times, I just manage to twist my eyebrows a bit and say "I'm tired" as a reply. I do this because I realize they wouldn't really know any better, I tend to keep things to myself afterall(arguably...for very good reasons).

But I'd be lying if I said I wouldn't miss any of it. The past two years were made very memorable for me because of the people I met and the friends i gained. And in some ways, it saved me from the hole I was in, gave me some things to do and less of the "other" things to think about. But like i said, you gotta know when to leave when it's time to.

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I won't be going home for the Holy Week, so this would be a first for me to spend it alone. Hmm, after this...maybe I should try experiencing Christmas alone...the one occassion I still haven't tried being on my own, haha. I'm kidding of course. or am I? Anyways, I'll look for some stuff to do, and since I'm a little short on dough...some soul searching spend free activities may be in order, hahahaha. Ooooh boy...it's gonna be a long summer.

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"They say that pain is inevitable but suffering is optional. If I learn to accept that pain is part of life, I will be better able to endure the difficult times and then move on, leaving the pain behind me." -from Courage to Change